


you are the earth that i will stand upon

by Colordrained



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Christmas, Christmas Fluff, Comfort, Crack, Cuddling & Snuggling, Drabble, Drabble Collection, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Fluff and Crack, Kissing, M/M, Quadruple Drabble, Sad Dean, Self Confidence Issues, it's basically 4 little drabbles combined, its not a story
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-11-13
Updated: 2013-11-13
Packaged: 2018-01-01 09:31:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 778
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1043238
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Colordrained/pseuds/Colordrained
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>four little stories explaining what cas and dean are and have always been</p>
            </blockquote>





	you are the earth that i will stand upon

**Author's Note:**

> So this is the first time I've done something like this, I hope you like it?(: lol the title is from This by Ed Sheeran. I needed some Christmas fluff in my life tbh

Sometimes it was just this. It was just Dean being Dean Winchester, pressing Castiel up against the wall and kissing him like it's the last thing he'd ever do. It was warm and strong and comforting, more than anything. Concrete. Dean would always be there like this for him. It was not even sexual. It was just Dean walking down the hallway to go find a book in the library, and Cas headed back to the bathroom to find a band-aid, and Dean just pushed him up against the wall and kissed him. Cas could feel him smiling; the soft press of his lips playful and loving. This was good. This was why Cas adored him. 

And other times it was Dean punching the wall, cracking the drywall because _fuck_ this was hard. It was Dean sobbing but pretending not to cry, and all this anger inside making him grit his teeth. He hated himself sometimes. Simply because he was not enough. He was never enough. It was all Sam and Kevin and Charlie and Bobby and Mom and Dad and Cas and Gabriel and Crowley and Meg and never, ever Dean Winchester. Dean was insufficient. He was a caretaker and a bystander. He was there to make promises and then let people down; to expose emotions and then rip them to shreds. It was Cas hugging Dean, hard, because while it seemed Dean Winchester could save just about anyone, he could never save himself. It was Cas pressing a kiss to his jaw and breathing an I Love You into his skin and just being still, letting Dean cry into his shoulder and not judging him in any way for it. Dean would cling to Cas, and know that if anyone in this world could make him better, he was right here. And it was Cas saying _'You are so strong, Dean. You are worthy. You are _good_. You must know this.'_ And Dean will never believe it, but god, it makes him feel so much better. So he presses his lips to Cas's forehead and mumbles a Thank You and Cas just hums gently in response. And this in not what they want it to be, but it's still a part of them that they know is there when nothing else possible could be.

And one time it's uncontrollable giggles because Sam was _totally_ pissed off that the christmas lights wouldn't work, and he knew it was just one little bulb that was causing the issue. He wouldn't stop cursing and balling up his fists and making this angry little face, and meanwhile it was Dean and Cas laughing like little toddlers, sipping coffee (for Dean) and hot cocoa (for Cas). And Sam would yell at them for this sort of taunting. And then Dean and Cas would catch a glimpse of each other laughing and Cas would take a dollop of whipped cream from his drink and dab it on Dean's nose, and they'd laugh even _harder_. And yes, maybe they each drank a bit before that, but it was all the same. And then maybe the buzz of the drink settled in and Dean would nuzzle his cheek into the scruff of Cas's, and then soon Cas was on Dean's lap, and they would be kissing way too deeply for what's appropriate when you're in the same room as your sibling. And then Sam would get the one little bulb to click and his face would light up along with the little blue and white string of bulbs. And then he would realize what Dean and Cas were doing and give them a little _'Guys. C'mon'_. So Dean would unwillingly separate himself from the man. And all three of them would help string up the tree with the lights and shimmery tinsel and tiny ornaments (Cas would break several of those). And then they would step back and an overwhelming sense of home would flood them. And they would smile, and giggle some more, knowing that they were there. 

But most times it's just this: Dean tracing stars onto Cas's hipbone and Cas's eyes threatening to close because it's so calming. But he forces them open, just to look at the soft shadows on Dean's face--all the shades of blue and grey and indigo. And he looks straight into Dean's eyes and smiles, soft. Just enough so that Dean returns the same grin. And they are silent, but they know. The amount of love and reliance and trust and loyalty is almost palpable in the warm air between them. They will always be this, and this is more than good enough for them.

**Author's Note:**

> I hope it was okay! I love comments(: have a good day/night xx


End file.
